V Episode Recap: Birth Pangs

Previously on V: Father Jack gets his walking papers from the church on account of his anti-V sermons. The big ambush goes down with Eli Cohen dying because Hobbes was persuaded by the Vs to detonate the place. (This makes so little sense; they played him a voice recording of someone named Sarah, who has never come up before in the show, at least not that I can remember. Ahh, love, or whatever.) Tyler’s Dad dies in the ensuing violence and Tyler leaves Erica to go live on the ship and leave his humanity behind. Erica gives him a sorrowful slap on his way out. He deserved a lot more.

Anna is looking at Tyler’s phosphorous levels because apparently this is the key to cross-species breeding. Remind me to lay off the whole-grain breads and peanut butter. Apparently Tyler’s levels aren’t up to snuff so Anna brings in a relief pitcher, a nice Spanish boy for Lisa to boink while Tyler is flying shuttle missions. Okay then…

Hit the jump for the rest of the recap!

Even with Anna’s threats, I don’t think the show will do us all a favor and just kill Tyler. Although they did shave his ridiculous hair, which is nice…

At least they shaved his Bieber bangs this week...

Erica needs to prove to the cell leaders of the Fifth Column that she is leadership material. She heads to Bangkok for a meet and greet and gets more macho than we’ve seen her before. It’s actually fun to watch her bring out her inner Rambo, especially since Hobbes is such a Rambo lookalike. So she heads to Hong Kong to find a Dr. Nye that was actually Erica’s ob/gyn. They break into her place and catch her and of course she’s a V who has been running experiments on pregnant women for over 20 years.

The best part is while Hobbs and Erica are breaking into her safe, Dr. Nye takes a flying header out of her 20th story apartment, and pops her V suicide pill before she goes splat. Good times!

So after some icky V nano-bugs come tumbling out of some pills, and some info given to them by Chad Decker via Lisa doing some spying, the team comes to the conclusion that the V are seeking genetically superior humans in order to facilitate their own evolution. Sounds fun!

Unfortunately, Anna is slowly but surely catching on to Lisa’s betrayal. After Lisa failed to bow-chicka-wow-wow with the nice Spanish lad (even after her Grandmother told her to do it as well; rough family), AND Joshua caught her downloading medical records for the Fifth Column, Anna moves on to contingency plan Freeze Dried Queen Egg 1138. Joshua does his medical magic and crosses this possible Lisa replacement egg with Ryan’s Half V/Half human daughter and voila: we now have a toddler instead of a month old baby! By next week I expect her to be 18 and unrealistically thin like all the V women.

It's tough when your Mom AND Grandma are pimping you out.

Oh, and Tyler is acting like a V. He can’t die soon enough as far as I’m concerned. He really is the Wesley Crusher of this show.

Next week: The great Ryan escape! I’ll bet it involves more shuttles!

Got any other shows you’d like me to recap? Let me know via email or on Twitter, where I’m @Stiffythekid.

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